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David DeAngelo Pittsburgh / United States, Male, 33
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David DeAngelo's last comments on poems and poets

  • (1/11/2008 11:14:00 PM)

    That last line was awesome.

  • (1/11/2008 11:03:00 PM)

    Nice poem, I love poems about sports.

    Repetition can be your friend or your enemy. In this case it was your friend. I liked the way almost all lines included his name.

    Poems don't have to rhyme. Don't force it. Sometimes words that are close will sound fine. (i.e. 'down' and 'round' don't exactly rhyme but they work together)

    Lastly, don't think about what you write. You will end up trying to hard and it will come out in the poem. Write about what you're thinking. The poem will flow better. Don't be afraid of writing random things here and there. You can always rearrange the thoughts later on. I rarely write a poem from start to finish.