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Anne Morin Portland / Oregon / United States, Female, 78
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  • (1/7/2009 11:11:00 AM)

    I relate to the passion, the anger, the frustration AND the love in this poem.
    A few editorial changes: You should write aren't (the apostrophe stands for the -o that was left out of the contraction) and dying and pretending are misspelled. Also, I'd leave out the And before 'otherwise' (redundancy) and the word should be BEcause, not cause. I would also leave out the capitalization in 'So I'll let youuu...' because the line expresses what you want to say without embellishing with all caps. My advice to poets is always to let the reader find your meaning; don't control them too much. I hope this helps! Best. Anne